Dealing with Anger

How Do We Deal With Anger?
There are three important aspects to understand when dealing with anger.
(Today, we will look at the first two.)

A. How You Express Anger Is Learned
First, the way you express anger is something you learn over time. We often pick it up from the people and environment around us our homes, relationships, workplaces, and culture. Because we all have a sinful nature, we naturally absorb unhealthy ways of handling anger if that is what we see modeled.

If anger around you was expressed through shouting, silence, manipulation, or violence, there is a strong chance you learned to respond the same way.

The Bible calls us to unlearn these patterns.

Ephesians 4:31–32
“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”

God does not only tell us to remove sinful anger He tells us what to replace it with: kindness, compassion, and forgiveness.

The Young Tree
Imagine a young tree growing in a big garden. All the older trees around it are bent and twisted because of strong winds over the years. Naturally, the young tree begins to grow crooked too.

But when a gardener comes and protects the tree, supports it, and cares for it, the tree slowly begins to grow straight and strong.

In the same way, many of us learned unhealthy ways of expressing anger because of the environment we grew up in. But when we allow God the Master Gardener to work in us, He can correct what is bent and help us grow in a healthy way.

God Can Change How We Respond
The good news is that we are not stuck with the way we learned to react.

Romans 12:2
“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

As our minds are renewed through God’s Word, we can unlearn sinful anger and learn to respond in ways that please God.

B. How You Express Anger Is a Choice
Second, how you express anger is also a choice. No one can force you to lose your temper. At every moment, you have the ability to choose how you respond.

Think about this: how many times have you been angry and suddenly answered a phone call politely?
“Hello, this is Tony. How can I help you?”

That moment proves something important you can control your anger when you want to. The real problem is not ability; it is desire. Often, we choose not to control it.

God’s Instruction Is Clear

James 1:19
“So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.”

This is not a suggestion it is a command from God.

Proverbs 13:3
“He who guards his mouth preserves his life,
But he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction.”

Proverbs 29:20
“Do you see a man hasty in his words?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.”

The Bible repeatedly warns us about speaking too quickly. Listening first and thinking before speaking is an act of wisdom.

A Simple Rule to Remember
God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason listen more than you speak. When you are unsure, pause. You can always speak later, but you cannot take back words once they are spoken.

When you choose to listen carefully and speak slowly, it becomes much easier to control your anger.

Learn to Be Slow to Anger
God Himself is our example.

Psalm 103:8
“The Lord is merciful and gracious,
Slow to anger, and abounding in mercy.”

If God were quick to anger, none of us would still be alive. As God is slow to anger, He expects His children to grow in the same way.

Proverbs 19:11
“The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger,
And his glory is to overlook a transgression.”

Ecclesiastes 7:9
“Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry,
For anger rests in the bosom of fools.”

Anger does not show strength. Self-control does.
Wisdom brings patience, and patience brings honour.

Bible Reading: Leviticus- 24-25

Dealing with Anger

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